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Happy new year!
What no one tells you about “living through history” is that there’s still endless laundry and deadlines and water around the sink (did a gaggle of geese take a bath in here??).
Remembering 9/11, we can paint a detailed picture of how we learned the news, how we felt, the horror of watching the footage. This year has been a tsunami of generation-defining news stories affecting lives on a magnitude we couldn’t have fathomed on 9/11. I think when I describe it to my grandchildren, I’ll explain how life as we knew it came to a sudden halt but we also still got up every day and made the oatmeal. I don’t know that I did all that I could, for my fellow citizens and the world, but most days I cleared the sink.
I donated to my food bank, voted, and ordered takeout. I started grad school, FaceTimed my family, listened to podcasts, and started running again. I stayed put and kept moving and sat in backyards. New friendships burgeoned on the playground as (another) dear friend moved away. I had the same cup of tea every day at naptime and the same conversation with my three year old morning noon and night.
It was an unforgettable year made up of unremarkable days, punctuated by beginning and endings.
I plan to use Laura Tremaine’s prompts to do some deeper reflecting, but in the meantime, I rounded up this extremely long list of my favorite things from our insular, at-home year for you. Please enjoy. :)
The Trader Joe’s grapefruit lemon hand sanitizer is the best hand sanitizer.
Ilia Super Serum Skin Tint is moisturizing and great for a “no-makeup” look.
Supergoop! Bright-Eyed 100% Mineral Eye Cream SPF 40 has become a staple. Since sun causes skin to age faster, I am hoping protecting this delicate skin around my eyes will help. It also has a minimal under eye concealing effect (for those of us with genetic or perpetual dark circles).
The Ordinary Natural Moisturizing Factors + HA is a rich, velvety moisturizer that feels much more luxurious than it’s $6 price point.
Nail polish: OPI Big Apple Red (good holiday red), O&J Obsessed, O&J JJ (JJ is my all-around favorite nail polish, especially in the fall.)
I love the grateful studs I got for Christmas.
Running wear I haven’t already shared: tights, shoes, long sleeve.
Re-upped my commitment to Birkenstocks. (My last pair withstood five years of heavy use.)
Novels: Transcendent Kingdom, The Lager Queen of Minnesota, The Vanishing Half
Nonfiction: Caste, Hidden Valley Road
Memoir and poetry: Nobody Will Tell You This But Me, What Kind of Woman, Know My Name
I have set myself free from the delusion that a live (dying) Christmas tree is important. I invested in a pre-lit artificial tree this year that will save my future self countless embittered family feuds at the Lowe’s tree lot and many curses at sappy pine needles.
I got this duvet cover (in smoke stripe) and weightless cotton sheets (Casper, out of stock now) when they had sales and I have never regretted upgrading our bedding. You spend a third of your life in bed, yada yada. But really, sleep quality only became more of an obsession for me in this year when I spent almost all 365 nights in my own bed.
My former budgeting system wasn’t working anymore (maybe this list is proof of that). I got this Google Drive budgeting template to mix it up and really like it.
I am not a crafty person, but occasionally I get a hankering for an extremely low stakes hands-on project. Dried orange garlands fit the bill perfectly this year. (If this isn’t how it’s supposed to look, don’t tell me.)
TV: Schitt’s Creek (Netflix), Dead to Me (Netflix), Mrs. America (Hulu), Ozark Season 3 (Netflix), Better Call Saul Season 5 (for purchase on Amazon Prime), The Flight Attendant (HBO Max)
Movies: Parasite, Hamilton (if “movie” can mean “ultimate triumph of stage and film.”)
Podcast episodes:
The Field: Why Suburban Women Changed Their Minds (The Daily)
The Sunday Read: Facing the Wind (The Daily)
Religious Liberty and Covid-19 (Pantsuit Politics)
Brené on Comparative Suffering, the 50/50 Myth, and Settling the Ball (Unlocking Us with Brené Brown)
Country of Liars (Great QAnon explainer from Reply All)
Nice White Parents (series)
Cancel Culture (The Popcast)
Faith Adjacent: Hamilton (The Bible Binge)
10 Thoughts on Therapy (10 Things to Tell You)
(My must-listens every week are Pantsuit Politics and The Popcast, especially this year.)
I fell off the wagon of sharing my Trader Joe’s finds but a few favorites are: jalapeno artichoke dip, English toffee, cocktail cucumbers, any of their Grand Reserve red wines, honey sesame almonds, and truffle ketchup.
I’ve used Plan to Eat for a year now and my meal planning and grocery shopping life has never been better.
Broccoli Fried Rice and Coconut Chickpea Curry became dinner staples.
Drinks: Cranberry Shrub (can be made into a cocktail or mocktail,) Bri McKoy’s Whiskey Sour, Limoncello La Croix (the only sparkling water flavor)
Philz coffee shipped free this spring so I got it as a treat. I like the Tesora and Philharmonic blends, and they are still doing free shipping on $27+ orders!
Baking : Confetti Holiday Shortbread (I used these sprinkles), Browned Butter Carrot Loaf Cake, Best Chocolate Chip Cookies, Samin Nosrat’s Ligurian Focaccia (a newish Christmas tradition for us!)
PJ’s (Christmas and otherwise)
Leggings and outerwear (We like the lightweight puffer vest and jacket. They also make the best kid masks, but they have been sold out for awhile.)
This sunscreen is still the best, after trying more bougie ones. Can’t beat the convenience of a spray though.
Books: The Rabbit Listened, Every Little Letter, What Do Grown Ups Do All Day (although I had to edit it to What Grown Ups USED to Do All Day for 2020). (My daughter is three for reference.)
My friend told me about Dr. Becky, a psychologist specializing in parenting. I learned so much from her Instagram (@drbeckyathome) that Mike and I started her course on managing tantrums and building emotional regulation. Mike has been using all the strategies on me and I’ve hardly had any tantrums. 😜
But really, she shares tons of practical advice rooted in the bigger picture of your kid’s emotional growth which I really appreciate as opposed to straight behavior management. She also helps parents set the right expectations, which is half the battle (for me anyway).
Emily Oster’s Parent Data newsletter cuts through the BS and moral imperatives of modern parenting with actual data. I’ve especially appreciated her parsing of Covid data related to children and schools this year. (Her books are also great!)
May 2020 leave you as it is Bets: wrapped in light, and a fabulous coat.
Many thanks for inviting me into your inbox this year. See you in 2021!
Best wishes and warmest regards, Jacey
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